Do you hear me?
I am a sad pathetic blogger.. trying to change my sedentary blogless lifestyle.
I love life.
I am 54 days post op and everyday is a new adventure. Shall I recap the past 54 days of life? I'll take some of the highlights/lowlights and share them, they may or may not be in chronicle order..
- Picture this. It's 3:02 AM in the morning, my heart is racing although breath must be slow or I choke on the blood flow in my mouth. My mouth is banded shut. I'm honestly not sure what's in my mouth. The IV in my left wrist is making my giant bladder look pea-sized. My mouth is covered in blood although so so dry due to the fact that the nurse can't give me water. The anesthesia is wearing off and my body feels so heavy. Even the simple act of lifting my head is unbearable. There must be a brick on my head! Where's Ashton? This is not funny. Actually, it is kind of funny. I was watching SNL. I figured my daddy would be woken up by my laughter, although my sweet and simple laugh was tied down by the mean surgical bands that adorned my new mouth. I was left to my own for most of the night. Hourly, my sweet night nurse came in and asked if I needed pain meds. I didn't even try to force myself to feel okay. I didn't. Maybe I was more afraid of what had happened. I really was afraid of this sucky device that sucked my mouth free of the pool of blood that was lingering in my numb face. Tears ran down my face and I longed for my mom. Everyone needs their mother in times of despair. Pre-surgery, I snapped a picture of my profile and quickly after, held my shaky weak hand to snap another. I was astounded. I couldn't express the joy of the change that had quickly changed my life. Jaw surgery was over. I did it! I lived. All I remember before I fell into a happy dream was the doctor talking to me in the surgical room. It was cold and the nurses simply wouldn't shut up and insisted on putting more blankets on me. I didn't care. I wanted this so bad. I don't care what you do, just go! My life was confusing and the journey was not over... It would be months, maybe a year until I could fully function as normal.
- The next event occurred on day 6 or 7.. I was tired and weak. Well, that was nothing new within those few days. I needed to get out. My face was swollen. So swollen! I begged my father to take me out. It was right after christmas and my brothers wanted to use their new "Sports Authority" gift card. We left to buy new "skateboards" and I secretly had an agenda of buying a new Nike gym bag! We weren't at the store for 15 minutes without something going wrong. Somewhere in the line of events of showing my dad my "soon to be" gym bag, I brushed my arm against my cheek. A pop occurred. Bring on the tears and hyperventilation. I took my brothers gift card box and spit a BIG GULP of fresh blood into the metal container. I hate blood. This was the scariest event that has ever happened to me
- I looked like Angelina Jolie for the first month post-op
- Started second semester of college
- Imagine Dragons! Wooohooo!
- Ombre Hair! Woohoo!
- First snow storm.. I LIVED (:
- Endured a paint fight!
- Took up a tap dancing class
- New addiction to How I Met Your Mother
- New Roommate!
- Sent a good friend off on his mission to Argentina!
I feel as if there are so many things to post! I will continue this post and more fun events that have occurred. I love you guys!
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